I never thought that the process of potty training could be so emotional. I am not talking about getting upset about mistakes, or Sage's desire to be in total control of when she wants to sit on the potty. The first night, after she did a #1 and #2, I was almost in tears. Thoughts of her growing bigger and just how I have been struggling lately with a good attitude and grateful spirit. At church on Sunday, we did a group prayer type thing where we just confessed for not having a right spirit and for thinking we can do it alone without God. It really helped me realize that I am not the only one who thinks or feels that about God, and that I can confess it and ask for help. Afterwards I was able to take a little deeper breath.
Yesterday was a day full of little accomplishments that mean nothing to the world, really. Well, certainly to other mothers. But laying in bed last night, and all through the day yesterday, I just felt God helping me and encouraging me in this work. The butt-wiping, cleaning pee off the floor, making cookies with two little ones, going grocery shopping, taking a bath. It was nice to be in the moment and feel. Even nursing Fern in the middle of the night, I found myself pulling her close and just reveling in her little body, even as she nibbled me with her new teeth. I am grateful for the day.
I don't know what today will bring, but I don't really care. I am glad even one day went so great.
Go Sage!!! that's awesome. :)
ReplyDeletemarni---yep, in the moment, in the day. lately i've been remembering about how sick i was when i was at the end of pregnancy with Della and how I couldn't take care of Levi, and had to let others help out. I thought to myself, I just want to be able to take care of my kid... i just wanted to be back in the crazyness of motherhood! and that's been helpful to remember. That it's a gift, you know? I, too, am comforted and helped by being around those who are honest about crying out for their need for God. That's why I read your blog, cause it's plain old helpful. Call me if you want to talk about potty training... I recommend the book: "Toilet Training in Less than a Day". It's an oldie but goodie.
yay!!!
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