still sick.

Yes, I am still really sick. I started using grapefruit seed extract in my nose and internally two days ago. It seems to be helping, I guess. Of course still using the standard Advil and Sudafed.
More importantly, today is our second day of NO TV. That's right, we took our TV and put it in the basement yesterday (ok, by "we" I mean DH). Numerous reasons behind this change, both practical and philosophical. Today was tough, S kept asking for movies and TV, mostly because of my lack of energy for creativity with her, and the fact we couldn't really go out and play due to the rain. I have already felt more productive, and even went for a bit of a jog tonight!! Even though I didn't get more than two hours of sleep at a time last night because of F. She has ear infection #3, woohoo! Hopefully tonight the amoxicillin will have kicked in a little bit more and she'll be in less pain. She has been nursing a ton this last week, I guess going through a growth spurt. She is looking real chubby! And that paired with poor naps and poor sleep means more time on the boob. Fun! We still have thrush. Fun! But yeah, back to the good part about the TV, I am really glad we got rid of it, and DH and I can still watch our Netflix on our computer.
Other good news: I started cloth diapering part-time again. I have both girls in g-Diapers covers, but with handmade inserts/prefolds and a fleece liner. Going fine so far, and I think with two in diapers I will just keep it simple with two covers and do wash frequently. Of course, disposables at night and nap time.

splitting

headache.
No pictures for today. If I were to post one, it would be the insides of a wet, gnarly tissue, barely able to contain the thick mucous that my nose is currently producing. Needless to say, that was probably enough of a description.
Right now I am running a slight fever and my head is pounding. The Advil should kick in soon to relieve me, and I just took a washcloth/sink shower (T is working on caulking our tub again, for the 4th time. I am trying to be patient this time so the job is actually successful), and I am sipping some tea, and I put fresh clothes on. Soon, DH will be picking up some RED MEAT for me, at Hikari. Does anyone (ALL THOSE READERS I HAVE!!!!!) know about The Blood Type Diet? Based on my blood type, O, I should be eating lots of red meat and I thrive on serious workouts. Well, I know the latter is true. I might try it out for a bit. Not necessarily to lose weight, but just because I am curious and have never tried eating a lot of red meat (in fact, I pretty much hate it). I have been vegan and gluten-free before though. No comment on that.
DH is watching Beowulf right now. How interesting ((gross)).
It's meat time.

I am so tired and feeling like crap still. However, I had a very productive day (again, it's Sunday, and Sage was with Daddy at work. MY how easy having one child at a time is). Note the throw pillow I made with a zippered opening, and the priming of the mirrors, and I also finished two coats of primer on the bookshelf! Thank God for creating husband and wife teams who compliment each other, because my DH finished sanding the bookshelf for me this morning! Woohoo! I think he knows it would've sat in our backyard for months if he hadn't. Now some brain-melting TV and potato soup (the first meal I've made since the last one I mentioned!!!! pathetic!!).

sickness

Hmm, for some reason I thought we were done with it. Apparently not. Fern, Sage, and I are all sick. Tray is on the mend, thanks to his steroidal nasal spray and heavy-duty anti-histamine. Sage has gross nose and cough, but thankfully her fever is gone and she is generally more accepting of life right now. Fern I think has another ear infection. Yes, number three. She has been up a lot at night, not taking good naps, is cranky, and she has a cough and snotty nose. The rash she had the other day was possibly just her body reacting to a new virus (probably the one Sage gave us). I have a nose running like a faucet, a fever, a terrible sinus headache, an achy body, I can feel fluid in my left ear, and general malaise. SO FUN. I have bypassed tissues and gone right to cloth diapers, that is how gross my nose is.
However, GOOD NEWS IS HERE (I forced myself to do something productive because I was starting to feel overcome with "poor me"'s): I took some old juice bottles (big ones) that we have been trying to recycle (for some reason the city refuses to take our recyclables) and cut their tops off to make bigger containers for my beefsteak tomato plants. A few of them were starting to wither because they had run out of room. Hopefully they'll continue to flourish. I also cultivated the soil a little bit in the backyard, and I kind of want to put some flowers in there. The soil isn't very deep, so I don't see any fruit plants surviving very long. I would actually prefer my husband to build some planter boxes or raised beds. However, for him to have the time to do that would require me to have both kids for some large chunks of time, and right now I have my fill of them. HA!
I am currently trying to refinish a bookshelf. I have never done this before. I don't know what color or what I'm planning on doing. I started sanding, and in typical Marni fashion, I'm already burnt out. I need a Dremmel or something. It is not only boring, but tedious, and the dust goes everywhere (I am doing it outside, don't worry). This is the point in all projects I so vigorously start that I need to remind myself not to give into my lazy human nature, to stick it out, put the hard work in, and persist.
Alright, I need to go fix myself a vitamin and Advil coctail.

new stuff

Here is my face lately. A mix of excitement, frustration, inspiration, impatience, and a couple other things. In cool news, I am getting some baby stuff off of craisglist today...well my husband is picking them up for me. Speaking of my husband, he has been sick since December and is finally headed to the doctor. AMEN. In other cool news, new stuff up at Etsy:

In fact, I am going to try to go finish some other hats while F sleeps and S is with daddy at the doctor.

teething again?

I think that S is teething again. I'm not sure if she is just sick and cranky, or she is getting four big molars (her two year molars). She has been so annoyed with everything lately, and taking it out on all of us.
As you can see, F's tummy is upset from her Amoxicillin, and she blows out of her diaper routinely, in two or more places. I had to take a picture, I couldn't resist.
In less messy news, the other photo is of the freehand embroidery I've been doing. It's a goat, if you can't tell. I am so excited. This onesie is going to my nephew, and we'll see how well it wears.
Both girlies are sleeping, thank God. It's too windy to have F outside today, so I have no idea how we're going to pass the next 5 hours.

muscles?

i went for a ride on this today. after being in the best shape of my life a year ago, it's tough to be so soft and cuddly sometimes. but i'm trying to remember this is such a short phase of life (breastfeeding and having two tiny ones). the bike ride was SUPER fun, i love the new bike. i went down to the river via spring garden street and rode for a little ways on the river path. it was a beautiful day out. it was great to have some time to myself also. i could tell my body had some memory of what it was doing, and now at the same time it's screaming out, "what have you done to me?" when really that would've been a super easy ride before.
now i'm making dinner (i can't remember the last time i did that!!)...zucchini cakes and fries ().
i worked on some bike hats today (tray takes sage to work with him on Sundays). I got exhausted. I am doing assembly-line style so it's hard to be patient with the finished product.
The Trenton Avenue Arts Festival was really, really cool yesterday. I wish it went on every weekend. In bad news, I saw my stuff still hadn't sold pretty late in the day. Oh well! There were a lot of really cool vendors and super cool people, it made me feel proud to live here and proud to be a part of something that cool!

Philippians

Philippians 2:14-16: " Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life-in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing."
this life is hard. i'm seeing that I need to have a better attitude about my struggles. Instead of immediately asking, "Why me?", I need to ask, "What do you want me to learn, Lord? Please give me what I need to make it through this struggle, and give me wisdom."
My friend and I started reading Philippians together and getting together to pray each week (or as close to that as possible!). I have been struggling with such a bad attitude these past couple of months.
I am not fixed. I am still being disrespectful to my husband and treating my girls like burdens at certain moments. But I am not dwelling in my negativity for so long and I see that this darkness is truly just a little cloud, that this phase WILL pass. I want to be refined and sharpened. I want to be willing to hear what God is trying to show me and teach me. I want to be a gentle and humble person. I want to be respectful and submissive to my husband. I want to be a mother who guides and teaches and disciplines her daughters in order to align their hearts with God.
In lighter news, I have been sewing and knitting a tiny bit (more so knitting as when I have time to do anything, there is usually a child asleep in the studio room). I knit my first wool soaker (wool diaper cover) and I learned a new technique for freehand machine embroidery. I feel inspired in a whole new way with that! I made my nephew a cool llama onesie and it turned out awesome!
We're about to head to the Trenton Avenue Arts Festival and the Kensington Kintetic Sculpture Derby. I hope it's fun!